Chelsea 3-1 Birmingham City – Newspaper Reports, Goal Videos, Carlo’s Reaction

Newspaper reports

The Guardian, Dominic Fifield : “Manchester United will not be quaking in their boots just yet but Chelsea, with little fanfare and virtually unnoticed, are creeping back into contention. The defending champions strolled to victory here, the ease at which they had brushed Birmingham City aside even reflected in passages of sloppiness after the interval that had Carlo Ancelotti pacing his technical area in frustration. Complacency cannot be tolerated but, privately, the Italian will be buoyed. Perhaps even optimistic.”

Daily Telegraph, Jason Burt: “It was almost like the last five and a half months did not happen at Stamford Bridge. Chelsea brushed aside Birmingham City with the kind of swagger that has not been witnessed since late autumn, since they were pulling apart all-comers, since before Roman Abramovich started his meddling. Again.”

Official Chelsea FC Website: “The Blues move up to second and made it 19 points from a last possible 21 thanks to a goal in each half from Florent Malouda and a strike to savour from Salomon Kalou. The game on a balmy spring evening continued on from the weekend away performance as Carlo Ancelotti retained the 4-3-3 shape and much of the same team.”

The goals

3′ Malouda 1-0
26′ Kalou 2-0
62′ Malouda 3-0
77′ Larsson 3-1 (pen)

Carlo’s reaction

“There are five games until the end of the season, our aim is to win every game and after that we can see where we are in the table.

“Everyone knows to close the gap of six points with five games is not easy. Our aim is to stay focused on the next five games, after that we can say the season was good or not good.

“The side played very well because from the back we are playing quicker compared to the difficult period we had.

“The strikers have more possibility to show their quality. This is good for the team. We scored after two minutes, so the game was more comfortable.

“For 60 minutes we played really well, the last 30 minutes were not so good. Maybe it was because we didn’t use all our energy before the end of the game.”

There are 52 comments

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  1. NorthernVA

    BB great piece of writing earlier. Also enjoyed the additional tune. Keep the coming my friend. A big thanks to the Ivorians tonight. Who knew Kalou had that kind of finish in him. World class is a term that get’s thrown around too often however tonight I felt DD proved once again he is in a different class than any other CF in the world. We’d be insane to let him go. Even at 33 you can’t place a price on that man’s contributions to the team.

    On a side note I saw a scoreline from the second leg of the youth run-in with the young Mancs. LTB as the resident expert what happened? Please tell me the young ones had some injuries,food poisoning, or all night sexcapades with the finest women of the night Manchester has to offer paid via unnamed sources.

  2. NorthernVA

    Sorry to post again however Paulo was excellent in the game last night. Quality and seems to be a real classy individual as well. I like personal virtues.

  3. Anonymous

    That was an enjoyable balmy evening. Just like the old days, taking the minnows apart with consummate ease helped by the return to form of Essien, Malouda, Kalou and Drogba. It all fell apart with introduction of Torres and specifically Anelka.

    Talking as an accountant David Luiz is an accounting conundrum, being both an asset and a liability. As for Drogba, either the malaria pills have finally started working or he’s got a contract negotiation meeting scheduled this morning with Mr Gourlay.

  4. John

    Agree with everything on here about return to form for Drogba, Lampard and Essien, Kalou’s excellence and Ferreira’s reliability (Paolo is past his best but I’d rather have him at right back that Bosingwa). Mikel was good too and it certainly went to pot a bit when Torres and Anelka came on. Bertrand interesting, and gave the lie to the general assumption that loan out = eventual rejection. He might not make it of course but he looked ok last night after going on loan some time ago to Norwich and seeming to have disappeared to be succeeded by Van Aarnholt. And seconded thanks for a great previous post as always from BB. It’s as if Champions League exit lifts a sense of impending doom – we hate it, desperately want to win it but know it’s difficult and that ultimately we’ll be shafted somehow – and relaxes crowd and players alike. Can’t believe we’ll win it from here and I’m now quite relaxed about finishing top 4 so I can enjoy the rest of the season.

    • Der_Kaiser

      Would agree whole-heartedly with that last sentence. Can’t wait to see the back of this season, but without the hideous CL monkey on our backs everyone concerned can at least enjoy the last few games.

      I’m loving the optimism from some quarters though; “and if Arsenal beat United…”

      Personally, I wouldn’t back Arsenal to beat a subservient egg if you gave each of them a whisk and a head start at present, let alone a title chasing United.

      Still, keeps it all amusing.

      • Anonymous

        My optimism is renewed and subject to the results on Saturday will be booking my Everton away tickets when they’re available Monday morning.

        Watching us winning the league on TV is great but there’s nothing like being there.

  5. Der_Kaiser

    We also note with some interest that young Mr. Kalou has stuck away a dozen goals so far this season – his best ever for us, I think and more than big-headed, permacrocked former Chelsea ‘legend’ J. Cole – and created a few more.

    But he is, we are told, utter shite and we should obviously sell him.

    • Anonymous

      Indeed, and of course The Drog, Lamps, JT, and Paulo are all past it and shite too, while Mikel and Malouda are just shite and all should be off-loaded asap ;-).

      Meanwhile, in a highly speculative report in the Metro, Roman continues to pursue his project to turn us literally into a Brazilian/ South American XI – cue head-shaking comments about cold, wet Wednesday nights in Bolton in February .

      • Der_Kaiser

        I believe bonus points are on offer for anyone able to spot the phrases ‘fancy dan’ (out of favour these days, for some reason) and Siralan’s personal favourite ‘Carlos Kickaball’…

  6. Cunningplan

    To adapt a really funny (I think) piece of commentary from David Coulthard at the recent Chinese Grand Prix…

    Carlo should ring Fergie and tell him, “We’re in form, fired up, and closing the gap to you quite quickly” and that message would only sound more scary if it were delivered in the dark!

  7. Cunningplan

    Straw poll guys, can we do this? multiple choice answers….

    a) Yes it’s now a dead cert
    b) Not a cats chance in hell
    c) Maybe if Brian Cox can get into Fergies head at the quantum level

  8. Cunningplan

    I can see by the current lack of responses, that perhaps I should add…

    d) Don’t want to get into any discussions with regard a possible title win, as it will probably come back and bite us on our bi-polar arse!

    • Anonymous

      You know you mentioned you were suffering from depression. Maybe you should add an option

      e) I do want to enter into a discussion but not with you

          • Cunningplan

            No Mark, I’ve obviously misread it, I’m due for an eye test soon and I’m still pondering, do I go for the quick fix at Vision Express and get my new goggles in a couple of hours, or go for the long haul with Specsavers and wait a couple of weeks. 😉

          • bluebayou

            It’s even quicker if you saw the ends off a couple of lemonade bottles and wire them together. Just make sure to sand down any sharp bits….

            I appreciate your efforts to spark debate and it’s good that you’ve returned from self-imposed exile, but can you clarify option C.

            Are you referring to some sort of conjoining between a well known Scottish Actor and a female ex-member of the Royal Family whose former husband is possibly more embarrasing than Phil the Greek? I have to say this has given rise to images that have left me in quite a bad place right now.

          • Cunningplan

            I do like your Interpretation of option c, but I’m afraid my version isn’t so colourful.

            I just want Carlo to play some mind games with old purple nose and mess with his head just like JM did, but you already knew that having the brain, and IQ level the same as Brian Cox. 😉

  9. bluebayou

    I enjoyed the game last night. 3 very good goals and some sterling work all round. Lampard is trying too hard I fear, and in harness with Essien we still lack something in midfield. But who knows what a summer of rest and a good pre-season might do. Malouda is picking up and Drogs is very much back to some sort of crash bang wallop type of form.

    Great to see Bertrand come on and make an impact. Was Cole just being rested or are his chronic ankle problems catching up with him I wonder.? And Ferreira had a good steady game, whch is just as well as he was able to bail Luiz out on more than one occasion.

    All in all a good professional performance. And we wont say any more than that…………….

    Though you do start to wonder…..

    Everton’s recent league form is up there with the best in the last dozen games we were reliably informed by R5 the other day. West Ham are one off the bottom. On Saturday Man U play Everton in the Theatre of Creams at 12.45. We play the Spam at home at 5.30pm.

    No, there’s probably only room for one Resurrection this weekend.


    I feel that playing Anelka like a midfielder these days (it seems that most of his touches happen near the half line) is really slowing down our game. When he receives the ball he usually puts his head down, tries to dribble in circles when a defender comes near and then loses the ball or makes a sideways pass! We should have intro’d Yossi w/ Torres…

  11. PeteW

    Kalou’s goal on Saturday was a very nifty finish as well. Easily our best forward this season.

    (I will continue to keep stating this, purely because nobody has yet either confirmed or challenged it.)

    • Anonymous

      Well, he’s rivalling The Drog and Malouda for domestic top scorer from about half as many starts as either of them, so you could have a fair point.

      As I’ve previously suggested he is the Ultimate Bi-Polar player it seems only fair we start a campaign to vote for him for Player of The Year, given the lack of decent cases for anyone else this time.

      P.S. – and The Player of The Year Dinner is on May 19th, so it will just sneak in before The Second Coming

    • Anonymous

      I’m not sure but tonight I’m in the company of Frank, John and Josh so I’ll ask their opinion.

    • Ososdeoro

      I believe I speak for many of us when it seems both an impossible truth to admit but at the same time can’t challenge it.

    • bluebayou


      Your channelling your hero Stanley Green and soon you’ll be marching up and down Oxford Street with a sandwich board proclaiimg “Less Anelka, Less Torres, More Kalou. And Sitting”

    • Anonymous

      Pete, I can’t say I agree that Kalou has easily been our best forward. Partially because I haven’t seen enough matches. Might he be our best forward? Maybe. Easily? I don’t know.

      But I’ve always been a fan of his. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, but I think he needs to play centrally. Good things happen when he is in the middle. Nothing happens when he is on the wing.

      Interestingly, Drogba makes good things happen on the wing.

      I liked the Kalou-Torres pairing earlier this season. I’d like to see it again. I think we’d be insane to let Kalou go. But then we’ll have a logjam at striker next year- Drogba, Anelka, Malouda, Kalou, Torres and Sturridge. And that assumes we aren’t buying Neymar. We can’t not play Sturridge, because he’ll want to leave, and he’s proven that he’s good enough to walk into any mid-table side. I have no idea what to do.

  12. bluebayou

    For those traditionalists who always thought that football should be played on a Saturday afternoon, the world ending 20 odd hours before the final round of games on Sunday May 22nd must leave them feeling to some extent vindicated.

    Had football not sold its soul to Rupert and assuming the title race goes down to the wire, at least one set of fans would have been experiencing their own momentary “rapture” and we could all have felt some sense of completeness as we plumetted down into the great chasm, there to burn in the searing flames of everlasting hell fire, our nostrils choked with sulpherous fumes and our ears assailed by the piercing screams of our fellow damned.

    Now we’ll just be lying there as our skin is flayed and salt rubbed into the smarting, raw flesh by the demonic servants of the nameless one, wondering about what might have been.

    And that is a very unsatisfactory way to spend eternity in my opinion.

  13. Anonymous

    I think that preacher’s off by a month. Isn’t today Judgment Day, according to the “Terminator” movies?

    Nice that Chelsea’s last game before the earth goes into nuclear apocalypse generated by the rise of intelligent machines was a good solid win. Though it would have been better if the last ever goal at Stamford Bridge had been scored by the home team.

    NorthernVA — I didn’t see the yoof. But my experience generally is that yoof team football is subject to much bigger swings, roundabouts and general accidents than the senior level. For the kids it really isn’t all about winning trophies or even games: they’re trying to get good habits and develop skills and gain experience. Occasionally you get a group where there are so many consistently good performers that the number of bad performances and bad games is reduced to almost negligible levels, and that’s what happened last year I think. (Almost all of last year’s team are now in the reserves or out on loan.) This year’s crop have looked fabulous at times when I’ve seen them, but they’re not as consistently strong and reliableh through the team.

    So on another day I’m sure they might have won up at the Theatre of Smugness, but it’s not any kind of shock or cause for alarm that on that particular day they got hammered.

    No way we’ll win the league, of course, but it would be nice to do well enough that all the “Carlo Out” brigade (including every newspaper in the country) end up feeling a bit foolish.

  14. Cunningplan

    I have a feeling that we’ve turned this blog into “The Scottish Play” as none of us want to discuss our title chances.
    As BT used to state “it’s good to talk”

    Ok I won’t mention it anymore as it’s making people slightly nervous. 🙂

  15. Ososdeoro

    I tried to read a Chelsea facebook thread once, Cunning. Not sure how Tony does.

    LOVE the new unis. Best in years (with the Navy/Yellow aways close).

  16. bluebayou

    This is the first comment on this blog after Torres scores his first goal for Chelsea.

    I feel the wieght of history on my shoulders. but fear not, they are broad.

  17. bluebayou

    But strangely, as the goal difference narrows, it maybe the injury time goal that Malouda scores, which makes the difference when the title is on the line, eh Clive?

    • Cunningplan

      Stranger things happen at sea BB, we’re still in it, and we certainly need to beat Spuds next week to set up the OT showdown.
      And just remember, we now have a weeks rest between games, which I think is hugely significant, and the one against us will be Utd’s fourth huge game on this run.

  18. Anonymous

    BB, assuming the results go our way, that might be a very important goal.

    Torres finally cleared his head and looked really good. Here’s hoping now that he broke his duck the entire team can’t stop scoring.

  19. Nick Benfield

    Where were you the day Fernando Torres scored his first goal for Chelsea?

    I was atop a rocky outcrop in Cornwall. Technology and Twitter FTW, as they say. Gonna wait for Match of the Day to watch it though, savour the moment.

    Opening a bottle of wine in celebration.

      • Nick Benfield

        £4.49 bottle of Chardonnay, half price from Tesco. A sucker for bargains. A recent study showed that people can’t tell the difference between cheap and expensive wine in taste tests – seems it’s all about the label. Tesco sell a £2.99 bottle of red Spanish plonk that I like to use in cooking that also tastes good to me. Easy drinking.

        Thanks for the donation by the way. 🙂

          • Nick Benfield

            Cheap wine and hookers, Clive, cheap wine and hookers. 😉 Just like a certain Welsh, left-footed Manchester United legend who’s allegedly been unfaithful to his wife and children but has a super injunction to cover it up. Allegedly. According to Twitter etc. Allegedly. Also at it are an ex-Newcastle legend and BBC female football presenter, plus a Scottish actor who was in Trainspotting. Allegedly. I’m thinking Twitter might be full of shit.

    • Anonymous

      Torres lit the place up with his display, as did Anelka but for me the MoTM is either Lamps who was immense or Obi who was sensationally good today. The only turd on the lawn today was Malouda – the player least deserving a goal!

  20. Der_Kaiser

    Those at the Bridge today will have noticed a very loud bang during the storm.

    Apparently lightning struck the stadium, according to the BBC.

    And Torres scored.

    I’m sure there is a gag relating to which of these events is more likely to happen again first, but even I’m not cynical enough to make it.

    Well, not yet, anyway.

    Good result. Keep on trucking, chaps.

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